Being nice to people is good, right? Yes you are right. There is absolutely no doubt that being nice is good. But what’s not good is being too nice.
There is a saying, “Excess of anything is bad” and this saying holds true in this case. Being too nice is bad for you. Now may be you want to site some examples of Film Heroes/Heroines who were very nice and then the universe saw the good in him/her and gave them ever lasting happiness. But that is a movie and movies are mostly work of Fiction.
Getting back to the topic at hand. So what are the drawbacks of being too nice to people:
1. People will see you as weak and will take advantage of you
Well, the first point is really not a shocker. When you say yes to everthing, then the other person is bound to take advantage of you at some point of time. You are so good that you just can’t say NO and make them feel bad. So, instead you make yourself too much available for them.
2. You lose your self-respect and importance to the people
Just note that I am not considering your family in any of these points. So, getting back, in connection with the first point, when you do too much and ask too little in return because you are too good of a person you lose the so called “IMPORTANCE”.
The person starts behaving as you will do and have to do anything they say and yes being too nice is a hard thing, because you end up doing those things, right? And in a way end up swallowing your own Self-respect in the process.
3. You will be overlooked and misbehaved with constantly.
Lets say you are in a relationship and in this case you are the boy. You love her very much and you are too nice to stop her doing anything because you have the fear that she might leave you or you might hurt her. So what do you do – NOTHING. In a way, the other half understands that you can’t leave them, so they become more aggressive and abusive towards you. And you do bear it.
Same is with people. When you are too nice to them, you give the opportunity to misbehave with you and in a long run, also neglect you.
4. You change yourself.
Don’t get the point wrong. You do change yourself because you want to meet the expectations of others . You want to please them.
I have been through this too much nice person phase and its’ not good for Yourself.
Be Nice. Be Kind. But not too much. There is a story which goes something like this:
Put a frog in a vessel of water and start heating the water.
As the temperature of the water rises, the frog is able to adjust its body temperature accordingly.
The frog keeps on adjusting with increase in temperature…
Just when the water is about to reach boiling point, the frog is not able to adjust anymore…
At that point the frog decides to jump out…
The frog tries to jump but is unable to do so, because it has lost all its strength in adjusting with the rising water temperature…
Very soon the frog dies.
What killed the frog?
Many of us would say the boiling water…
But the truth is what killed the frog was its own inability to decide when it had to jump out.
We all need to be nice to people and adjust with situations, but we need to be sure when we need to adjust and when we need to confront/face.
There are times when we need to face the situation and take the appropriate action…
If we allow people to exploit us physically, mentally, emotionally or financially, they will continue to do so…
We have to decide when to jump. Let us jump while we still have the strength.